[As he so accurately put it. It's been over a week and Lightning still hasn't come to a firm decision about what she should do, or if she should do anything at all.]
Yeul cares about him, but he hurt Serah.
[And fought against Lightning, but at the end of the day, she can live with that. What she can't deal with quietly is him being anywhere near her sister, which is more likely to happen than not thanks to his blatant disregard for the rules she lay down on his first day here. Hell, it didn't even take that long for him to step foot into her house, even after she warned him not to.
She trusts Gladio as much as she trusts herself, but she's at a crossroads. It's another part of why she's here.]
I know it's not really the same, but when you found out about Ardyn being here, what did you do?
[ Not exactly the same, but more similar than Lightning might expect. Ardyn hurt Ignis and Luna pretty badly, and engineered the fall of the Crown City, in which Gladio's estranged mother lived.
As for what he did about it... ]
I knew that our fight wasn't here. I suggested a temporary truce, although it wasn't my call in the end.
[ That was for Ardyn and his Kings to negotiate it. Luna, too, would have had a say at the time. ]
[She'd laugh at the idea of attempting a truce with Caius if it wasn't something she'd already tried, both here and back home, although her idea of a truce isn't exactly what one would call conventional. It mostly involved shoving him around and ordering him to stay away while he barked his "witty" comebacks at her and refused help. Lightning had mostly given up after that.
He's right about one thing, though – that their fight isn't here either, but that isn't going to stop her from wanting to punch some sense into Caius anytime she sees him.
As for what Serah thinks...]
It doesn't matter.
[Lightning blurts it out before she truly realizes what she's saying, having let her frustration get the better of her. Of course it matters what Serah thinks, but how is Lightning supposed to sit back and not do what she feels she needs to?
Stubbornly and a little embarrassed, she grumbles under her breath.]
I'm her sister. I'm trying to do what's best for her.
I don't think there's a single person who doubts that.
[ He laughs a little bit that she even had to proclaim it, because of course she's trying to do the best for Serah. It's not only an older sibling thing, which he knows about, but also part of who Lightning is as a person. Deciding what's best for someone else can be to her own detriment sometimes, but who is he to tell her she's wrong?
He rises from his chair, then drags it a little closer to her, until they're within reaching distance. He then turns the chair to sit on it properly, with the back rest behind him this time, although he's hardly leaning back. No, he leans forward, manspreading his giant legs as always. ]
Are ya gonna keep trying to kill each other here, then? Is that what's best for her?
[She's quiet while she watches him move, being reassured by that added closeness, though she remains where she is and very still as she considers her answer. Caius not being here would be what's best for all of them, would it not? But that's not a call that Lightning can make, and she knows as much.]
No, but I don't think Serah's happy to see him, either.
[No one needs to tell her that. She knew from the moment she saw Caius that his presence would only bring the Farron sisters grief.]
He was relentless. He wanted to destroy the timeline for Yeul's sake and didn't care about what happened to anyone else. Serah and Noel got in his way, and he made them pay for it. [Under the sheets, her hands ball into fists.] Even if I wanted to kill him, I can't. All I can do is protect them... protect everyone.
[ His hand reaches out to her shoulder, firmly grasping it. ]
I can't think of a better person for the job. As long as you're here, he won't do shit. [ How eloquent. ] And as long as I'm here... nothing's gonna happen to us.
[ He lets go of her shoulder, and his hand moves under the sheets, trying to find hers. He doesn't need to see those balled fists to know she's tensing up. ]
No truce, then.
[ It's as simple as that. They'll just wait and see what happens, without forcing the issue one way or another. He made it clear he's with her no matter what, and if this guy really did hurt Serah, and his presence makes her uncomfortable, then this is absolutely Lightning's call to make. ]
[He won't need to search for long – her hand finds his soon enough and her fingers thread among his.
No matter how many times she hears him say it, Lightning always feels like she can move mountains when she does. This time is no different. He doesn't need to tell her because she already knows it and he's made it perfectly clear, but as someone who's fought her own battles for so long, it's hard for her to remember sometimes that she doesn't have to anymore. It's enough to help ease some of the tension she's carrying in her shoulders.
But truce or no truce, and whether or not she's fighting alone, there are still things that further complicate the relationship between Lightning and Caius. Things that leave a bad taste in her mouth, and quite possibly hinder any progress they might make to at least being able to tolerate one another.]
Caius is the reason the goddess is dead, and he's responsible for the Chaos infecting our world... but I still tried to save him at the end of it.
[Keyword being tried. Lightning breathes a tired laugh – one of the 'can you believe it' brand.]
I thought that if I could, that maybe he would find a way to change.
Hm. Maybe after everything, he felt like he didn't deserve to be saved.
[ Or he could just be a dick with too much pride. Gladio hasn't met him, so it's tough to judge the man, but he's trying to give Lightning the most hopeful answer. The kind that shouldn't make her feel bad for even trying. Can he believe that she tried to save someone like that? Honestly, no, but... it warms his heart to know she's capable of such forgiveness. She did the right thing, even if she failed.
Still, the mystery here is why she failed, and it may not be her fault at all. ]
Reckon he's the kinda type with capacity for self-reflection?
[Lightning knew that self-reflection wasn't a thing in his vocabulary long before she walked into that throne room, but that didn't stop her. He might not have deserved to be saved or would have changed given the chance, but there is something else that Caius has the capacity for – something that has the power to change people in the most unimaginable ways. Lightning is living proof of it. His version may be twisted, but it's there whether he wants it to be or not.]
It was love. [Her fingers tighten unconsciously around his.] That's what stopped me. Yeul was the one who asked me to save him... All she wanted was for him to be happy in a new world, but no matter how hard I fought, there was nothing I could do. Her love for Caius tethered him to the Chaos and wouldn't let him leave it.
[Some part of Lightning, deep down, held out hope that he would atone for his sins by living a life that Yeul wanted to. Nothing would erase the damage he'd caused, but it could make him better. If not for his own sake, then for Yeul's.
She and Caius aren't so different...]
I might have been able to find a way, but in the end, I couldn't help him and he didn't want my help. You can't save someone who doesn't want salvation.
[ What she's telling him makes a lot of sense, or as much sense anyone can understand. When you put aside all the complicated parts of the story, it all comes down to someone not taking a life raft on a sinking ship. ]
[She's known it for some time, but never heard of how it came to be that way until only recently and while she was happy to hear it, knowing what she does now makes having him here much more trying.]
Last I saw them, Caius said that he and Yeul would be the ones to watch over the cycle of life and death in Etro's place, but... from what I heard, Caius freed her from the fate of the Seeress so she could come with us to the New World, and she did.
[Her voice and words grow sharper.]
It was almost going to be me who stayed behind. God's plan was to make me the goddess who would shepherd the souls of the dead. Someone has to do it, but it was Caius instead.
—tch.
[Lightning's hand slides out from his so that she can fold her arms, and her shoulders tense up around her neck. It hadn't really dawned on her until he showed up but in some strange way, for all the hatred she has for him and all of the suffering he's caused, all Lightning can feel beneath her anger is sorry for him. Not only that, but like she owes him thanks for taking that place in Valhalla and for freeing Yeul – that's what angers her the most.]
[ He can't imagine Lightning wishing it were her who stayed behind, nor would Gladio particularly want that fate for her. ]
Hm. Who knows, maybe it was you who needed saving in the end...
[ Not because she's weak or anything, he thinks, but he had been wondering for a while if someone like the Saviour needed their soul saved as well. He's fairly sure she'll fight him on this, though, and he has no intentions of riling her up, so he quickly moves on unless he wants to be zapped in his sleep tonight. ]
Claire... whatever happened in the old world... maybe it's best to leave it there.
[Her disagreement is distinct across her features at that sentiment. Caius had done her no favours as far as she's concerned – he is the reason their world would up the way that it is now, and if he hadn't meddled with the timeline, Lightning might have had the chance to start building a life in their new home with Serah and the others.
She's not going to dwell on it at the moment, though, because regardless of the defenses she so quickly built up around herself just now, he still manages to draw a soft laugh out of her.]
There's still a lot I haven't told you.
[Namely, that he hit the nail right on the head: at the end of the day, the one person who needed to be saved the most was herself... but that's a story for another time. For now, Lightning takes him by the hand again and tries to tug him, gently, off his chair to join her in bed.]
Maybe it is better that way, but there are things that I can't forgive. Caius is here now, and I have to watch out for my family.
[If he does join her, Lightning will make room, but it's not without extending her pinky finger at him and hooking it around his at the first opportunity.]
[ He was always going to join her there, but the tug at his hand is a clear signal that he should do it now rather than later. Happily, he obliges without much of a fight. He's also very close to pointing out that her family is his family, too, but thankfully she cuts him off before the words come out of his mouth. It's only fortunate in the sense that he wonders if that's a big step for them, to consider each other family already...
...but it wouldn't be wrong if they did.
Wait, is she pinky-swearing him something?! ]
Huh? You bein' serious right now?
[ does she not realize how adorable she's being, he won't ever let her live this down... ]
[Lightning is a little thrown off and confused by his question because no, she doesn't realize how adorable she's being. Accept the pinky-swear!! >:T
Whatever he was going to say about family, what she's about to promise should make it perfectly clear where she stands on the matter, even if neither of them is prepared to say it out loud just yet. He was her family before he even knew her name...
Her pinky gives his a squeeze.]
We'll stand by each other, no matter what.
[Through hell or high water, because that's what partners do. It doesn't need to be said because they both know as much already, but it doesn't cost anything for them to remind one another of it when they can. Lightning is so used to doing things alone, so it helps to be able to say it, if not for his sake than for hers. There's no sense in her vowing to protect him from Caius, or from anyone for that matter, because what was it he'd said to her?]
We can't protect a shield, but two of us are better than one, right?
[❤ Something along those lines. It gets her point across well enough, she hopes...]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
[As he so accurately put it. It's been over a week and Lightning still hasn't come to a firm decision about what she should do, or if she should do anything at all.]
Yeul cares about him, but he hurt Serah.
[And fought against Lightning, but at the end of the day, she can live with that. What she can't deal with quietly is him being anywhere near her sister, which is more likely to happen than not thanks to his blatant disregard for the rules she lay down on his first day here. Hell, it didn't even take that long for him to step foot into her house, even after she warned him not to.
She trusts Gladio as much as she trusts herself, but she's at a crossroads. It's another part of why she's here.]
I know it's not really the same, but when you found out about Ardyn being here, what did you do?
no subject
As for what he did about it... ]
I knew that our fight wasn't here. I suggested a temporary truce, although it wasn't my call in the end.
[ That was for Ardyn and his Kings to negotiate it. Luna, too, would have had a say at the time. ]
Ya haven't said what Serah thinks about it.
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He's right about one thing, though – that their fight isn't here either, but that isn't going to stop her from wanting to punch some sense into Caius anytime she sees him.
As for what Serah thinks...]
It doesn't matter.
[Lightning blurts it out before she truly realizes what she's saying, having let her frustration get the better of her. Of course it matters what Serah thinks, but how is Lightning supposed to sit back and not do what she feels she needs to?
Stubbornly and a little embarrassed, she grumbles under her breath.]
I'm her sister. I'm trying to do what's best for her.
no subject
[ He laughs a little bit that she even had to proclaim it, because of course she's trying to do the best for Serah. It's not only an older sibling thing, which he knows about, but also part of who Lightning is as a person. Deciding what's best for someone else can be to her own detriment sometimes, but who is he to tell her she's wrong?
He rises from his chair, then drags it a little closer to her, until they're within reaching distance. He then turns the chair to sit on it properly, with the back rest behind him this time, although he's hardly leaning back. No, he leans forward, manspreading his giant legs as always. ]
Are ya gonna keep trying to kill each other here, then? Is that what's best for her?
no subject
No, but I don't think Serah's happy to see him, either.
[No one needs to tell her that. She knew from the moment she saw Caius that his presence would only bring the Farron sisters grief.]
He was relentless. He wanted to destroy the timeline for Yeul's sake and didn't care about what happened to anyone else. Serah and Noel got in his way, and he made them pay for it. [Under the sheets, her hands ball into fists.] Even if I wanted to kill him, I can't. All I can do is protect them... protect everyone.
[She casts him a pointed look.]
no subject
[ His hand reaches out to her shoulder, firmly grasping it. ]
I can't think of a better person for the job. As long as you're here, he won't do shit. [ How eloquent. ] And as long as I'm here... nothing's gonna happen to us.
[ He lets go of her shoulder, and his hand moves under the sheets, trying to find hers. He doesn't need to see those balled fists to know she's tensing up. ]
No truce, then.
[ It's as simple as that. They'll just wait and see what happens, without forcing the issue one way or another. He made it clear he's with her no matter what, and if this guy really did hurt Serah, and his presence makes her uncomfortable, then this is absolutely Lightning's call to make. ]
no subject
No matter how many times she hears him say it, Lightning always feels like she can move mountains when she does. This time is no different. He doesn't need to tell her because she already knows it and he's made it perfectly clear, but as someone who's fought her own battles for so long, it's hard for her to remember sometimes that she doesn't have to anymore. It's enough to help ease some of the tension she's carrying in her shoulders.
But truce or no truce, and whether or not she's fighting alone, there are still things that further complicate the relationship between Lightning and Caius. Things that leave a bad taste in her mouth, and quite possibly hinder any progress they might make to at least being able to tolerate one another.]
Caius is the reason the goddess is dead, and he's responsible for the Chaos infecting our world... but I still tried to save him at the end of it.
[Keyword being tried. Lightning breathes a tired laugh – one of the 'can you believe it' brand.]
I thought that if I could, that maybe he would find a way to change.
no subject
[ Or he could just be a dick with too much pride. Gladio hasn't met him, so it's tough to judge the man, but he's trying to give Lightning the most hopeful answer. The kind that shouldn't make her feel bad for even trying. Can he believe that she tried to save someone like that? Honestly, no, but... it warms his heart to know she's capable of such forgiveness. She did the right thing, even if she failed.
Still, the mystery here is why she failed, and it may not be her fault at all. ]
Reckon he's the kinda type with capacity for self-reflection?
no subject
[Lightning knew that self-reflection wasn't a thing in his vocabulary long before she walked into that throne room, but that didn't stop her. He might not have deserved to be saved or would have changed given the chance, but there is something else that Caius has the capacity for – something that has the power to change people in the most unimaginable ways. Lightning is living proof of it. His version may be twisted, but it's there whether he wants it to be or not.]
It was love. [Her fingers tighten unconsciously around his.] That's what stopped me. Yeul was the one who asked me to save him... All she wanted was for him to be happy in a new world, but no matter how hard I fought, there was nothing I could do. Her love for Caius tethered him to the Chaos and wouldn't let him leave it.
[Some part of Lightning, deep down, held out hope that he would atone for his sins by living a life that Yeul wanted to. Nothing would erase the damage he'd caused, but it could make him better. If not for his own sake, then for Yeul's.
She and Caius aren't so different...]
I might have been able to find a way, but in the end, I couldn't help him and he didn't want my help. You can't save someone who doesn't want salvation.
no subject
[ What she's telling him makes a lot of sense, or as much sense anyone can understand. When you put aside all the complicated parts of the story, it all comes down to someone not taking a life raft on a sinking ship. ]
Does that mean Yeul couldn't be saved either?
no subject
[She's known it for some time, but never heard of how it came to be that way until only recently and while she was happy to hear it, knowing what she does now makes having him here much more trying.]
Last I saw them, Caius said that he and Yeul would be the ones to watch over the cycle of life and death in Etro's place, but... from what I heard, Caius freed her from the fate of the Seeress so she could come with us to the New World, and she did.
[Her voice and words grow sharper.]
It was almost going to be me who stayed behind. God's plan was to make me the goddess who would shepherd the souls of the dead. Someone has to do it, but it was Caius instead.
—tch.
[Lightning's hand slides out from his so that she can fold her arms, and her shoulders tense up around her neck. It hadn't really dawned on her until he showed up but in some strange way, for all the hatred she has for him and all of the suffering he's caused, all Lightning can feel beneath her anger is sorry for him. Not only that, but like she owes him thanks for taking that place in Valhalla and for freeing Yeul – that's what angers her the most.]
That's why it's so damn complicated.
no subject
[ He can't imagine Lightning wishing it were her who stayed behind, nor would Gladio particularly want that fate for her. ]
Hm. Who knows, maybe it was you who needed saving in the end...
[ Not because she's weak or anything, he thinks, but he had been wondering for a while if someone like the Saviour needed their soul saved as well. He's fairly sure she'll fight him on this, though, and he has no intentions of riling her up, so he quickly moves on unless he wants to be zapped in his sleep tonight. ]
Claire... whatever happened in the old world... maybe it's best to leave it there.
no subject
She's not going to dwell on it at the moment, though, because regardless of the defenses she so quickly built up around herself just now, he still manages to draw a soft laugh out of her.]
There's still a lot I haven't told you.
[Namely, that he hit the nail right on the head: at the end of the day, the one person who needed to be saved the most was herself... but that's a story for another time. For now, Lightning takes him by the hand again and tries to tug him, gently, off his chair to join her in bed.]
Maybe it is better that way, but there are things that I can't forgive. Caius is here now, and I have to watch out for my family.
[If he does join her, Lightning will make room, but it's not without extending her pinky finger at him and hooking it around his at the first opportunity.]
Hey...
no subject
...but it wouldn't be wrong if they did.
Wait, is she pinky-swearing him something?! ]
Huh? You bein' serious right now?
[ does she not realize how adorable she's being, he won't ever let her live this down... ]
no subject
[Lightning is a little thrown off and confused by his question because no, she doesn't realize how adorable she's being. Accept the pinky-swear!! >:T
Whatever he was going to say about family, what she's about to promise should make it perfectly clear where she stands on the matter, even if neither of them is prepared to say it out loud just yet. He was her family before he even knew her name...
Her pinky gives his a squeeze.]
We'll stand by each other, no matter what.
[Through hell or high water, because that's what partners do. It doesn't need to be said because they both know as much already, but it doesn't cost anything for them to remind one another of it when they can. Lightning is so used to doing things alone, so it helps to be able to say it, if not for his sake than for hers. There's no sense in her vowing to protect him from Caius, or from anyone for that matter, because what was it he'd said to her?]
We can't protect a shield, but two of us are better than one, right?
[❤ Something along those lines. It gets her point across well enough, she hopes...]